Dear Parents,
First of all, let me begin by acknowledging the journey you’ve just embarked on. Learning that your child is neurodiverse—whether through a diagnosis of ADHD, autism, dyslexia, or another neurodevelopmental difference—can stir up a mix of emotions. You might feel overwhelmed, relieved, confused, or even uncertain about what comes next. And now, perhaps you’re also beginning to wonder: What if I’m neurodiverse too?
This is a common experience for many parents. Supporting a neurodiverse child can often bring up feelings of recognition—you start to see familiar patterns in yourself. The struggles your child may face, such as difficulty focusing, sensory sensitivities, or social challenges, might mirror experiences you’ve had throughout your own life. If that resonates with you, it’s worth paying attention to. Seeking an assessment can be a valuable next step for both your well-being and your family.
Why Consider an Assessment for Yourself?
Self-Awareness Brings Clarity and Validation
You may have spent years wondering why certain things have been hard for you—whether it’s maintaining focus, managing emotions, or feeling "different" in social situations. Discovering that you’re neurodiverse can provide deep validation. It’s not that you’ve failed or fallen short—your brain just works differently.
Improved Parenting Through Understanding
When you understand yourself better, you can also become more attuned to your child’s needs. Parents who receive neurodiverse diagnoses often say it helps them empathise with their child’s experiences. You’ll be able to model self-acceptance, self-care, and advocate for the kinds of accommodations that help both of you thrive.
Mental Health Benefits
Unrecognised neurodiversity can take a toll on mental health. Adults who discover their neurodiverse traits later in life often report long histories of anxiety, depression, or low self-esteem from feeling "different" or misunderstood. An assessment can open doors to tools, therapies, or coaching tailored to your brain’s strengths and challenges—providing much-needed relief.
Addressing Common Hesitations
Many parents hesitate to seek an assessment for themselves, feeling they should prioritise their child’s needs. But supporting yourself is supporting your child. If you’re struggling, it can be difficult to manage the demands of parenting. Recognizing your neurodiverse traits allows you to build systems that work for the entire family.
You might also worry that it’s "too late" to pursue an assessment as an adult. The truth is: it is never too late. Understanding how your brain works can be transformative at any age. Whether it leads to new strategies for managing challenges or simply gives you peace of mind, it’s a meaningful step toward personal growth.
What Happens After an Assessment?
If you do receive a neurodiverse diagnosis, it’s important to know that it’s not a label—it’s a roadmap. You’ll have the opportunity to reflect on your strengths and challenges and explore ways to make your environment more supportive. There are also communities of neurodiverse adults who can offer advice and solidarity as you navigate this new understanding of yourself.
You Are Not Alone
Parenting a neurodiverse child can feel isolating at times, but remember: there is a growing community of parents on similar journeys. You’re not alone in this. If you suspect that neurodiversity runs in your family, consider reaching out for an assessment. It’s an act of self-compassion that can benefit your entire family.
You and your child are on this journey together, and embracing your neurodiversity—whether confirmed or not—can lead to a richer, more authentic life.
Warmly,
Dr. Sheena Kumar